Violins and Other Things Beautiful...

70. Watch the Orchestra.

The difficulty of writing this is unbearable...

We went to the orchestra Saturday evening. It was such a beautiful, unexpected evening. Beautiful Music, Beautiful Faces, Beautiful Mental Stimulation, Beautifully Real.

I’m transitioning to a place where my Strength will be the most beautiful thing about me. The transition requires Courage and Bravery.

My Violin hasn’t been played much; the strings are out of tune and eroding with dust. I’ve forgotten how to hold my bow; it’s not even in my hand anymore. Few people have picked it up for me; fewer know how to hold it properly; One seems to comprehend the extraction of music with it.

I’m aware of you as you linger behind me, you touch my arm, guiding it to position. My chin automatically settles. Your hand rest around my wrist; You’re holding my bow. I take hold of it, You gently let go.

Deep Breath.

How will this sound? I want to know if I’m still capable of beautiful sound. Will you continue to listen if it’s not true? I’m still aware of your touch.

Deep Breath.

The bow moves along the strings, innately I know how. It’s out of tune badly. I’m scared to try again; I’m scared to see your reaction. Have I disappointed you?

It hurts to hear what has been tarnished. The dusty erosion still feels so raw. The feeling of bow against dust is uncomfortable and vulnerable. I know my sound can be beautiful.

Will You help me? Will You redeem my sound? Will You restring my soul? I want to play for you.

Be brave little Violin, Be brave.

“Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this; He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noon day sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.” Psalm 37: 4-7